The Hater Post

… Cause of Death: Kesha

First off, let me say I’m aware that usually the first sign that you’re getting old is when all the songs on the radio begin to “suck”. More often than not, music isn’t getting worse, you’re just getting old. The “good” days of music is almost always the era that you grew up in. Ten years from now people will be saying, “Oh why can’t they make real music like Soulja Boy anymore!?”

Also every era of music has its performers who were more image than substance. Spice Girls in the ’90s, Debbie Gibson in the ’80s, and just about every boy band in existence fall into that category. Heck, 60% of pop music falls into that category.

Having said all of that… Kesha still sucks even by those standards!

She sucks in such a horrific and unprecedented fashion that she sets a new low for the over-produced under-talented segment of the music industry. Kesha even makes Britney Spears look like a musical genius on the level of Mozart (okay, maybe not).

So it’s ironic that Kesha recently was trashing Britney Spears for lip-syncing. But judging by Kesha’s own live performances, maybe she should lip-sync since she struggles to sing even her own simplistic songs. I’ve seen high school talent shows with people who could sing and perform better.

Her studio recordings, artistically, aren’t much better. Her vocals are heavily over-produced even by today’s auto-tune standards. Underneath all that production there really isn’t much of a singing voice or talent at all.  Her lyrics range from mildly amusing to mind numbingly idiotic and shallow. Some of the actual music is catchy and has a decent beat but that’s more a credit to Kesha’s producers than her.

It seems her primary job is to maintain her image of being a trashy drunken slut that’s “real”. She’s basically a Las Vegas trip on infinite loop.

Despite the title of this post, there actually is some good pop music out there. Lady Gaga, Beyonce, Taylor Swift, and a few others all have a good degree of talent to go along with their image.

I’m just worried that Kesha is setting the bar so low that we’re going to get a flood of copycat no-talent “personalities” taking up space from legitimate artist. Look, there’s always been an epic battle in pop music between the factions of talent vs. image. The successful acts usually had a good mix of both. But Kesha threatens to tip the scales tremendously in favor of the no talent hacks.

But I have a feeling Ke$ha couldn’t care less…

The cover issue of Elle magazine is none other than Taylor Swift. Here are the photos from the shoot:

First off, I should say that I’m a huge fan of her songs … that weren’t introduced on the radio. The song “Love Song” and “Teardrops on my Guitar” makes my ear bleed. The lyrics are so corny and on-the-surface, they have made no real impact for me. It is songs like “Breathe”, “The Way I Loved You”, and “Fearless” are songs that have made me respect her as a singer/songwriter.

As a person, Taylor Swift seems to annoy me. Obviously, like any celebrity, we as bystanders only know such a high profile person from what is being said and portrayed through media. And through the media, Taylor Swift seems like the girl next door who is just the perfect little angel.

Being a fan that I am, I kept my eye out for her in the media, and eventually my likeness for her dispersed. Through the whole Kanye West fiasco and the Joe Jonas incident, she seems like a whiny girl always playing the victim.

During the Kanye West incident, it took her forever to stop bringing it up in interviews and such. I’m not saying what Kanye did was appropriate at all, far from it. But some things you just gotta let go! And with the Joe Jonas and the 27 second breakup issue, she continued to harass him in public over and over and over again. We get it, he’s a douche. Now, move on and focus on your new beau, which I believe is the other Taylor.

I suppose my little rant was my way to ease into my opinions on the photo shoot. I adore the photos! It steps away from her usual “goody-goody” glitter-sparkle dresses (I was getting really sick and tired of those glittery dresses) and more roughed up.

Ironically enough, the cover of this April 2010 issue has her in a gray sparkling dress. Gag.

If you listen to the radio, you’ve probably heard the song ‘Tik Tok’ by Ke$ha, even if you were unaware of the title of the song or the upcoming artist.

How would you know? If the female singer’s voice annoys you as she sings/talks, if the female singer’s singing seems ordinary, if the singer isn’t even singing, then you know the song I’m talking about.

It seems that Ke$ha (and anyone else annoyed by the dollar sign in her name?) has been trying to make it in the music industry for a while now, and finally got her breakthrough during the early parts of 2009, according to Wikipedia (yeah I know I should try to find more reliable sources but seeing as I don’t care much for this ‘artist’, Wiki is better than nothing).  Her debut song, Tik Tok, has been numero uno on iTunes for weeks now, and is definitely getting playtime on the radio.

What irks me about her after listening to her debut single is that she seems talentless. Her voice is whiny, which anyone who can speak can do, and when she sings, there’s nothing oh-so-spectacular about it. There are tons of talented musicians and singers that deserve that record label instead of her, and yet here she is. Why?!

Okay, perhaps it’s because she has the physical appearance that will make money for the record label. But then, as I start browsing the web for a picture of her that is appealing, all I could find were images similar to this:

Oh yeah, she’s definitely a hottie. Not. Perhaps that’s why in all her photos, half her face is covered behind hair and glitter.

Then, there’s this sense that she’s already famous before she has even debuted her album. Money signs replacing the “S” in her name? Glitter? Can she express her reasons for being in the music industry any further?

If anyone would care to explain the appeal of this Kesha who has a money sign in her name, if not for the looks or the talent, I’m all ears.